BLOGG # 92 FALLING IN LOVE AGAIN !

As my many readers know who have read the bloggs I wrote while I was in Spain, I am a woman with an inconstant heart-falling in love over and over again with, for example, the cities of Barcelona, Bilboa and of course Madrid.Really, I spent the whole time in Spain "in love" Now I am in that state again and the object of my affections is Reginald. Let me tell you about it.For some time now I have been looking with great concern at my inability to keep up with my ADL- the professional term for "activities of daily living" which, when translated, means the inability to cope with domesticity and I was seriously thinking of hiring a cleaning woman. I am a realist and know this will eventually come about but not just yet. My finances aren't brilliant and I still feel the need to have such things as my red wine , the occasional oyster and the indulgence of buying a lovely scarf. Really a cleaning woman was not an option. So I spent my days sitting in my recliner contemplating this new problem of mine while watching the dust balls accumulate under my feet.However, even I have -though minimal-cleanliness standards, and finally got out the vacuum cleaner and started it up. It immediately regurgitated it's contents on my carpet. I did the only thing one can do in such a situation and went to bed and pulled the covers over my head. When I woke up I had this wonderful idea. I will buy a vacuum robot known as a ruomba and that is just what I did. I immediately called my grandson to help me set it up. Now I will give out some of my accumulated knowledge of life. Men love vacuum cleaners and also cleaning surfaces so if you are concerned with your significant others' low spirits give him either a vacuum cleaner to tinker with or a cloth and a flat surface to wipe- believe me this is good advice. My grandson was delighted and came over and happily programmed the robot and yes, we named him Reginald-Reggy for short. Every day from Monday thru Friday at twelve noon he would clean for one hour. We gave him the weekend off. Together we watched this amazing machine -a true Trojan warrior -as it worked it's way around the apartment going it's way over and under furniture sucking up everything in it's way.Nothing stopped it though occasionally it got stuck and had to be rescued.It just never gave up until it got around all obstacles in order to clean and I was pleased. I too had worked my way around obstacles- the obstacles of domesticity. I sat in my recliner drinking a glass of red and watched my carpet being cleaned and was content. My advice to you dear readers is to do the same-never let the obstacles of life get you down but take Reginald as an example and work your way around them and NEVER GIVE UP.

BLOGG # 91 "ARE YOU A UNICORN?"

Yesterday evening I went to my local swimming pool between 6pm and 7pm for my routine exercises followed by a sauna. I love going on Sunday evenings as the pool is always empty. After a nice swim I walked into the sauna and right into a discussion and heard "I have a five O'clock shadow and need to shave every five hours or so." There were groans and nods around the room. I saw there were five men in the sauna and all involved in this lively discussion -I was the only female and as is the usual habit when in such circumstances,I kept a low profile in a corner. The man who made the comment continued saying it was a bother of course but it was the only thing she asked him to do and she was worth it. All the other men agreed "Women are always worth it". The lively discussion continued but I didn't follow as I was too intent on my own thoughts until I heard the word "Unicorn". I was amused and showed it. The man sitting next to me asked if I minded this frank discussion and I assured him I did not but was fascinated as I thought only women had these discussions about the opposite sex. I was assured otherwise and was included in the discussion and was asked for an occasional opinion. They were talking about this graph they had read about which measured female desirability. The graph measurements dealt with the level of "Craziness and hotness of the female sex. The most exciting woman, they agreed , was crazy- crazy and hot- hot and was at the top of the scale -but,unfortunately, these women were difficult though exciting.The talk continued to "Less Crazy and hot" etc and downward -I turned off at this point until I heard the word "Unicorn" again. "What" said a man not in the know "is a Unicorn?" Another man said "They don't exist" But the man who was explaining it all said "The Unicorn is a woman who rates zero on the Crazy" scale and ten on the "Hot Hot" scale [only men could devise this] but they don't exist of course except that he had found one!" he was obviously in love]-"and she was a keeper." I did have to laugh at this point.The discussion then turned to the main differences between men and women-really a lecture for my benefit [they kept asking me if I agreed-of course I said yes -one hates to hurt their feelings] Most of them had obviously read "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" and agreed these books should be compulsive reading for young males. The basics ,said one man earnestly to me, are that men need to be needed. "Ahh"I said,"That is why my friend traveled so far to fix my plumbing?" "Of course" they all said in unison. Women on the other hand need to be "validated" and they were very firm about that-I agreed. Next they discussed the need of men to go into "the Cave" when perturbed and the need of women to go deep into "their well." It was very important that women did not accompany men into the cave and very vital to not pull the women out of their well until they reached up their arms to be pulled out .Well, dear readers,never have I been so entertained in a sauna or learned so much! I left early , thanked them, and said I had to go home and recuperate with a glass of my favourite red. But the question remained. Was I a Unicorn? and my dear female readers -Are you?